Dear Fourum, I seriously just put a t-shirt on a squirrel. Should I wash my hands?
I'm confused: boy, belly shirt, long hair, really, really, really classy glasses, tight pants ... what the heck?
To the girl with the overalls-short style: seventh grade?
I saw a cowboy step on a roly-poly and it ruined my day.
To the sweet, old, feeble lady walking across the street: I can't wait to be like you some day. Hang in there.
Stupid sociology project, I almost got eaten by a dog.
BRI administration: overpaid, underworked.
I'm so happy Ugg boot season is finally over.
JoCo sorority girls suck.
Osama and Obama ... wait, aren't those the same people?
I just threw away a styrofome cup. Suck on that, environmentalists.
Save water. Shower together.
Help save the environment. Don't use toilet paper.
Girls are dumb. Throw rocks at them.
Hey, women's basketball team: You guys are going to suck next year.
To the girl who was jogging down 11th at eight o'clock last night: You are really hot.
Call on me! I love me some sno-cones.
Did anyone see Rusty's review in the Manhattan Mercury from the health inspector? Very disgusting, and not surprising.
To the girl in Call Hall who smiled at me on Wednesday: We should definitely hook up.
Why is it that all the AZDs have to wear their Xi-man shirts, but not the president? Doesn't make much sense.
Softball + face = pain.
I'm going to need a bucket, a paintbrush and ten pounds of salt. Lance? Get his pants.
To all the girls out sunbathing: Put some lotion on the skin or it gets the hose again.
If I lie down and sunbathe with you, will you roll on top of me so I don't get sunburned?
So Goodnow finally turned on their air conditioning. Unfortunately, it made my room smell like brown sugar and applesauce.
If this is life week, does that make all the other 51 weeks death week?
To all the ladies who have brought out their wonderful summer attire recently: Thank you.
Is it just me, or is this new giant circle drive relatively uneventful? I feel like there should be a statue or a water fountain.
To the Tri-Delts: I'd like to let you know I know why you're winning Derby Days. It's called quid pro quo. Look it up.
To the girl that just picked her nose and ate it on Poyntz: You're on "Candid Camera" now!
So hot! Milk was a bad decision today.
Hey Fourum, just walking home from class and thought I'd give you a call because I haven't talked to you in a while.
I'm pretty sure the guy driving behind me just got a blowjob. Is that legal?
You know it's sad when your finger gets more action that you do.
To the girl who was studying in the Kedzie bathroom: The library is right across the hall.
Finish this sentence: I enjoy the company of prostitutes because...
I bet if you're riding around on a tandem without another person you feel like a big dork.
Because guys driving topless is hot, whereas girls driving around topless is illegal.
Okay, I thought the Fourum was supposed to answer the phone at all times. My message is: This is Chompers from West Hall reminding you to vote for Vicky for president of West Hall.
K-State has a bunch of hot girls, but where are all the hot guys?
To the guy in the black Pontiac Sunfire: You're gay.
Mush, do the dishes.
Dirty, do the dishes.
Burn, do the dishes.
To the football player reading the Bible at the Derb: Please marry me.
I love dirty, dirty house music. I rock, I disco, I rock, I disco!
To the guy who snot-rocketed on his girl on his tandem bike: FAIL.
So is it bad that I walk to class with morning wood?
Why would anybody have such a sensitive car alarm on such a piece of crap car?
Men have big knee caps. It's for war, durr.
I watched Aladdin today. It was awesome.
There is nothing like drunk-dialing the Fourum. I can have apologies please?
To the person in Moore Hall with the laser pointer: You suck.
There's a monster in my room. We just go smoothies over coffee. Well, I think it's quite absurd. So then he got hungry and licked his hand and tried to eat me.
I just had the strangest vision: The apartment was on fire and you were standing in the kitchen covered in cherry pie.
Dad, I just spent all my college funds on cocaine.
I stuck my keys somewhere they shouldn't go. Here's a hint: it's not in my ignition.
Went to Hale tonight. Did a lot of work, made out in the stacks. Great night.
My roommate likes to sniff air freshener and it creeps me out.
Hey John, I'll tell you exactly what Freeman needs, and that's a good swift kick to the nuts.
To the girl I hit with the Frisbee at 1 a.m. the other night: You're it.
I depend on the Fourum to give me a daily laugh, and the Fourum has sucked the past few days. What is up?
4 comments
Who's game?
- Amen to that as well. He's gonna find out real quick you can't be a pretty boy p*ssy in the NFL. And you can't quit on your team when things are going bad
- Amen to that