Long distance relationships effect K-State students in military, regular life


On average, a long-distance relationship tends to last about four and a half months. However, people across the nation are engaging in long-distance relationships because of college, military, work and personal preference despite the proverbial ticking clock.

Rebecca Laessig, junior in human resource management, said her long-distance relationship with her husband made her find her own mechanisms to cope outside of her comfort zone with her relationship.

“First of all, it depends on the situation,” Laessig said. “You have to find your own coping mechanisms.”

Laessig said that her husband being more than a phone call away has made her appreciate her time with him that much more. Laessig said she thinks that long-distance relationships strengthened her marriage because it tests the members and their ability to adapt.

“I think [the relationship] is definitely stronger,” Laessig said. “It puts you in a place where you really have to push yourself and test yourself and the relationship.”

According to an article in Science Daily from July 18, nearly 75 percent of all college students have engaged in a long-distance relationship at some point. According to the article, 3 million married couples in the United States live apart.

Ross Heide, freshmen in milling science, agreed that distance can make a relationship stronger. His personal experience from his long-distance relationship is enough proof for him.

“Honesty, trust, communication and just putting you relationship in [God’s] hands are probably the most important aspects in any relationship,” Heide said. “You don’t have the luxury of seeing each other in person whenever you
want like you can when your at home. I think long distance almost builds
or makes these aspects stronger in your relationship.”

Laessig said she thinks that trying out a long distance relationship makes people more aware of their personal strengths.

“It’s either a make or break situation; some people can handle it and some people can’t,” Laessig said. “If you can make it, it makes you that much stronger.”

According to an July 18 article in The Huffington Post by Catherine Pearson, couples that engage in long-distance relationships develop a stronger sense of intimacy because their interactions were longer and more meaningful than people living near each other.

Abby Stedry, sophomore in animal science and industry, said that long-distance relationships aren’t always healthy.

“There is always downfalls in relationships and because of how far away
you are physically, it seems to bring quite a bit of emotional distance,” Stedry said.
“I think it’s negative, because it seems to bring more distance and
secrets in a relationship in comparison to when they are together.”

According to the Huffington Post article, Laessig is one of 3 million people that are
living apart from their spouse for a reason other than divorce or

“When you are faced with a hard situation, you can either face it and make it work, or you can choose to not deal with it,” Laessig said. “If you find someone that is worth it, you will make it work.”

Heide said that long-distance relationships need a steady foundation to build up from, but once that is complete the relationship is possible in his mind.

“Long distance is possible and it can be just as good of a relationship, if not better than a normal one,” Heide said.

Laessig said she thinks that distance makes life harder because the one person you always want to turn to, isn’t always available to Skype or pick up a phone call.

“For two people who spent all their time together and were happily in love to be in a situation like this, it’s really hard,” Laessig said.

Laessig said Skype is helpful in trying to connect with her husband while he is away, but it is less personal – which makes it even harder.

“You’re talking to a person, but you’re really talking to a machine,” Laessig said.