Members of the Student Governing Association elections committee were called to investigate after the release of emails that indicate the University of Kansas student senate interference in Kansas State’s student body elections in early March.
The emails, which hackers obtained from student body president-elect Jack Ayres’ student email account, imply that members of KU’s student senate colluded and conspired to influence SGA elections and elect Ayres through the use of reverse psychology, subliminal television messages and mind-control techniques.
In one email, members of Ayres and running mate Olivia Baalman’s campaign are shown to have visited Lawrence and received tickets to KU basketball games from KU’s student senate, presumably to influence legislation at K-State in favor of KU.
In an email attachment, Ayres is depicted “waving the wheat” alongside a large Jayhawk.
Ayres took to Twitter to denounce the claims as false.
“FAILING Collegian can’t accept my success, so they start fake news that KU and I are friends. SAD!” Ayres tweeted Friday night.
“The students elected me by widest margin (several million in fact!) in SGA history,” Ayres tweeted, in direct contradiction of the fact K-State’s student enrollment sits at 22,048 for the spring semester.
According to K-State information technology records, Ayres’ emails were leaked after he mistakenly clicked on an email clearly marked as “phishing attack.”
“It’s a mistake anyone could have made, alright?” Ayres said. “I was looking for a good Father’s Day present, and to be fair, phishing attack sounds like either a cool band name or a state-of-the-art fishing rod.”
Lame-duck student body president Jessica Van Ranken declined to be interviewed for this story, but issued a statement saying the matter is “not (her) problem.”
Members of the SGA elections committee said they are interested in the case so far but will likely decline to investigate, citing general indifference.
This story is an April Fools’ joke and not intended to be taken seriously.