Legality is mostly a matter of geography and perspective. So go ahead and skinny dip in that fountain. Plus, he is just a mall cop and probably can’t even arrest you, anyway.
July 23 – Aug. 22
Stop rage-reading the news and take a nap. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is seriously lacking in revolutionary zeal.
Aug. 23 – Sept. 22
This week is a mess and you will be, too. Just snort some [DRUG CENSORED BY EDITOR] up one nostril and some [OTHER DRUG CENSORED BY EDITOR] up the other and let God or the Stars (or whoever) sort out the rest.
Sept. 23 – Oct. 22
Gift your haters a can of bug spray and some KY jelly, so the “OFF!” they can f*** will always be there when they need it.
Oct. 23 – Nov. 21
Your soul is like a field of wildflowers: beautiful, free and often full of bees.
Nov. 22 – Dec. 21
With a little preparation and the right tools, you will nail that job interview. (The tool is a nail gun. Bring a nail gun.)